Sunday, February 28, 2010

One Man CAN Make a Difference!

A little set up. Before I went to the bank to deposit about $37.50 worth of checks, (kids, find a different profession than freelance artist) I did a 'lil grocery shoppin' at Jewel. The parking lot is set up the usual way with yellow painted stripes making up the parking lanes where you end up face to face with the car in the next row. When I came out, the car in front of me had left, so I just zipped forward through the empty space and on my merry way. Long dull story even longer and duller, I pull into the bank lot which seems to be set up the same way (keep in mind I've been there 200 times before) facing another car in the adjoining row.
I do my Bank of America business, jump back in, and see that the coast is clear, the car that was in front of me is gone. My wee brain remembers how I left the last lot, so I put the '98 Pasatt in drive and hit the gas to repeat going through the empty space. Imagine BA-BAM! combined with CA-CRK!! and a heapin' helpin' of KR-CHUNK!!! as the front of the car inexplicably shoots into the air then smashes back down. "What the...!" I jump out to discover the reason. The riveted in the ground, 300 pound, 10 inch high, 5 foot wide, concrete parking stop that is now smack dab doodle under my car. Random thoughts- Can I redo the last 30 seconds of my life? What expensive auto parts did I just smash? Why am I am such a G*******D DOPE!
I try driving easing it back up and over in reverse "gently" 'cause I didn't want to crunch the underside of the car in FRONT of the tires too, but it ain't happenin'. Next plan, I dash back inside the bank and recruit 6 fellers to try 'n lift the car back off the block. They all must have done stupid in theirs lives too which bonded us, 'cause it wasn't that difficult to get their help. No luck, we couldn't get the car back off. Not that anyone was really killing themselves (what do I want for free?!). Should have recruited a group of women to watch us flex 'n strain forcing us to man up. I probably could have whittled blocks of wood with a 90% angle that the tires could have easily gone up and down, but... (refer to the previous "I'm a G*******D DOPE" statement).
I took a mile and a half head bowed feet dragging walk of shame to local Pete's Auto to tell my tale of woe and stupidity. Pete was nice enough not to laugh, (I figured he'd chuckle later when he wrote the bill) and sent out a tow truck. Should take about 20 minutes he guessed. Two hours later Pete explains that the tow truck couldn't pull it off the concrete and they had to spend quite awhile smashing it to 'lil bits with a sledgehammer before being able to hook it up to the tow truck. Apparently all the bank patrons, employees and president watched the process. I was glad for the small bit of mercy that I wasn't there to be the center of attention as they laughed and pointed. Once the car got back Pete hoisted it up on the lift. I sat down and silently said goodbye to the remains of my savings account ready for the news of the $1500 in repairs to the drive shaft carb generator transmission dohicky.
Pete asked if I wanted to pay the $75 tow charge in cash or credit. No damage.
How did I make a difference in the world we live in (since you're probably expecting the title to tie into the story at some point)? How can just one humble man forever change things for the better?Just take a drive yourself to the corner of Cicero and Peterson and peek in the Bank of America lot. I've only seen it through binoculars, since I've yet to return, but, because of me, ALL the concrete block have been removed and yellow stripes, the way God intended, now mark the spaces.
You're welcome America!

Tips Fer Artists!

Flea Market Find! I put this up for all my fellow struggling artist friends. Y'know days when you just can't get a drawing to work? Let's take a face for example. The expression isn't quite right, the features are lopsided, whatever... well, our brother here has found the solution for all of us!

Free Tat Designs!

Todays Free Tattoo Design! I'm keepin' it simple today, so no excuses! Get 'er done!

Art to Poop On!

Beth Cisco and I are putting together another group show at The Tattoo Factory Gallery here in cold Chicago. Opening night is March 26th (feel free to bring my birthday gifts that evening to save postage!). The theme (give Beth her props) is "Art For You to Poop On (the toilet seat show)"! As many artists as I could think of have joined in to take an actual toilet seat and turn it in to a functional piece of art. Here are my rough drafts....

Flea Market Treasure!

It's still snowing, which brings me to todays Flea Market Find! Now I could rattle off about a dozen so-so quips, zingers and witticisms about this cover guaranteed to make you guffaw, chortle and hee haw, but I'm gonna let ya'll do the work today!

Flea Market Treasure!

Quickly! Here's your palate cleanser from the naughty woodsman!
"Chimps Am Phunny!"

Rude Flea Market Find!

"Ma'am, here's the delivery of stiff lumber for your fireplace!"
HMMMMM. You're not laughing. Let me walk you through it. The "stiff lumber" alludes to his penis, while the "fireplace" is symbolic of her vagina. By saying he's going to deliver it, he's using code to say he plans to engage in sexual intercourse with her.
Now lets all laugh together!

Would You Like Pepper With That?

If you're a Mitch O'Connell, you have a few lofty, seemingly unattainable, life goals. One of them is to hoist a giant pepper grinder at the dinner table asking guests, "Would you like pepper with that?"
Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars because maybe, just maybe, dreams WILL come true (model
ed by the lovely Kieran O'Connell)!
PS Now my object of desire is to find a 6 footer!

For the Sophisticated Theatre Goer!

See every play TWICE that Chicago's Redmoon Theatre presents.

I didn't want that point to get lost in my ramblings!

Facebook friend/Redmoon Artistic Director Frank Maugeri (I put that in the order of what I'm sure is Franks importance) bestowed upon me and my youngsters 3 tickets to see the newest production of "The Cabinet" based on the fantastic 1920 German expressionist film "The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari". That film is beautiful and riveting, and of course without it there would be no play production, but I have to say I enjoyed the "The Cabinet" more!You know those seats that have "reserved" on them? Well that's where we sat! Jus' saying'! The play, portrayed though puppets and their macabrely made up puppeteers, tells the story of the somnambulist Cesare used as a killing tool by Dr. Caligari. Everything is stunning. The warped sets, animated projected images, lighting, every movement of the actors (both wooden and flesh), the beyond moody music and especially, and it's near impossible to have anything rise slightly above complete perfection, the thoughts of Cesare were so poetic that I wanted to hastily scribble down ever one of them to repeatedly savor (that memory thing isn't working for me so much). Leo's jaw stayed in the open position and eyes unblinking throughout the hour. On the other hand, Kieran said she was tired, wrapped my jacket around her, burrowed into my side and soon was softly snoring (we were at the 10pm performance if that takes the edge off her review) .On the way to the car Leo jumped up and down proclaiming that this was the best play he had ever seen! Better than "Mary Poppins", better than "Wicked", wait, maybe a tie with "Wicked",no,"The Cabniet" was better! We have made a blood vow to attend everything they do.

As a special treat we happened to be in the same row as "The Cabinet's" puppet maker and artist Lisa Barcy. And, like Frank, I'm sure is much more proud of her Facebook friendship with me.

Flea Market Treasure!

I've been playing this game every night for a week. It's great fun, but I'm starting to think it might be better with 2 people!
Rim Shot! Cymbal Crash!
Good night everybody, you've been a great audience!

I'm Hip (or, hip replacement)!

I mentioned previously that I discovered online radio stations (the week before I let you all in on my other recent discovery, McDonald's restaurants). Well, I rode KISS online into the ground (there's only so many times I can listen to the live version of "Domino". It's 127 if you were wondering). Plus it was hard to enjoy while son Leo shouted from the kitchen every 4 seconds, "That SUCKS!" He took pity on his elderly father, or was desperately trying to avoid hearing Gene and Paul (and the other rotating KISS members) again, when he punched in and showed me how to make my own radio station. We entered some groups I liked that were not KISS (Fountains of Wayne, MIA, Snow Patrol and MGMT), and Pandora made up a playlist of those and similar artists. Now Leo and Kieran will actually request that I turn it up (My kids like me! Sob!)! I got all happy about the new songs I was hearing and Leo rolled his eyes, pretended he was doing a Pete Townshend strum on an air guitar and sarcastically grunted, "DETROIT ROCK CITY!".I'm moving into the future as fast as my mobility scooter will let me!

Flea Market Find of the Day!

Jokes include-
He can make change!
Funny Money!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

What was that Honey?

Flea Market Treasure! She was the mascot of the "Silent Woman" restaurant near my Grandparents house. Made quite an impression on me! That combo of headless and sexist has found it's way in a few of my pieces. I remember my mom would get Ms. Magazine and in the back there was a page that reprinted similar sexist finds (that would make a great book collection). I was always fascinated by odd and ass backwards mindsets (not that I have it all figured out)!

A Tree Grows in Chicago...

Went for a long walk with my daughter and photographed something I've wanted to or quite a while, trees growing through and becoming intertwined with metal mesh fences. Does that make me a deeply thoughtful intellectual poet ruminating on the divisional struggles of man and nature? Yes ladies, it does!

More musings on life...


Flea market find of the day! I like to think this is the story behind these photos. They're taken by her husband who is crazy in love and finds her quite hot stuff. She feels adored and very sexy with him. They live happily ever after!

More sneak peeks at my mystery project!

Another sneaky peeky!

Clowin' Around!

Tasteless Treasures! On your mark, get set, GO! I used to have Santa as part of the happy trio. Years ago I purchased about 50 of the big jolly elf and gave them away as Christmas gifts, looks like I gave away one to many! Someone remind me in November so I can order 50 more!

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Flea Market Finds!

My daily photo! A flea market find of a bank where you deposit your change thru the zipper. Another "Wrong any way you look at it" treasure!

Flea Market Finds!

Daily Pic dug out from the M.O'C archives of all thangs wacky 'n weird. If the category "Wrong" had only one item, this would be it!

Flea Market Finds!

Flea market find from the Zsa Zsa Gabor estate. Trying to find the PETA "Toss the bucket of red paint" game to go with it!

More "I Heart Chicago"! 6

Also, if you're ever bored, you can always pause 'n enjoy the perfect proportions of the Hispanic mannequins!

More "I Heart Chicago"! 5

...and, finally, The Simpson's set of figures showing Bart's world famous catchphrase, "You Can Stop!"!

More "I Heart Chicago"! 4

...then a set of (I'm sure) licensed "Superhero" action figures, featuring Batman, who is "Out to Catch All Baddy!!!!

More "I Heart Chicago"! 3

Shopping this weekend? Hit the "Buyers Flea Market" @ 4545 W. Division. Used to refer to it as The Mexican Flea Market (with love) 'cause me and the kids were the palest folks there (I'm usually the palest person anywhere), but I'm guessin' that must be wrong somehow. Best selection of the wonderfully gaudy! Giant beltbuckles covered with faux diamonds and rubies, shirts covered with faux diamonds and rubies and burritos covered with... well, you get the idea.
During my last visit, First I bought some "Beauty Undergarments"....

More "I Heart Chicago"! 2

Another role model of mine! Drunk animals always make the best mascots!

More "I Heart Chicago"!

More proof that Chicago that Chicago is the best (Well, proof that I like it here)!
Right in my alley is this sign. In Chicago, it's the law!

Another peekypoo!

Sneak Peek!

Sneak peek of a top secret project (Mitch, if it's so "Top Secret", why are you posting it?). Good Lord, stop with the questions already!

Free Tattoo Design!

Now I like to act like I'm hot stuff in the belief that that vibe will rub off on all of you, but I don't think anyone has taken a single one of these Blog posted designs to the shop and had them tattooed yet! My delusions of popularity are the only thing that's keeping me together, please don't shatter it for me by letting reality peek through. Someone, anyone, at least get this one tattooed!

Flea Market Treasure!

She was the mascot of the "Silent Woman" restaurant near my Grandparents house. Made quite an impression on me! That combo of headless and sexist has found it's way in a few of my pieces. I remember my mom would get Ms. Magazine and in the back there was a page that reprinted similar sexist finds (that would make a great book collection). I was always fascinated by odd and ass backwards mindsets (not that I have it all figured out)!

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Flea Market Find of the Day!

Daily Pic from the archives! He always seemed like such a nice quiet polite boy!

Chicago Rocks 5!

And finally, my personal hero and role model, the mascot for Foremost Liquors, congratulates me on another well done run!

Chicago Rocks 4!

Nothing says Christmas was almost 2 months ago than a display of the baby Jesus swaddled in snow with an electrical plug draped over his nose surrounded by Mary, John, Mrs. Claus and an elf!

Chicago Rocks 3!

For the man on the go, like myself, who doesn't have time to go here and there for all his shopping needs, let me make a suggestion!

Chicago Rocks 2!

Next up, all your bath/shampoo needs! My favorite? "Court Case" which will make the gods smile upon you next time you have to have something settled by a judge!

Chicago Rocks!

On my morning jog I decided to bring my camera to document what makes Chicago wonderful! Next time I'll stroll, I mean run, in a different direction for more peeks of the big city. First up, AAA Plus has the perfect window display to show off their talents!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

The Wolfman!

Leo wanted to see The Wolfman (as did I) and asked if we could go. Well, now that he's 14 he's often hangin' with his friends, so when I'm offered some of the formally taken for granted pop and son time, I'm taken' it. My whole day (like all parents) could be happily spent just squeezing the kids (you'd just have to ignore their protests and struggling). We loaded our pockets with cans of Coke, purchased the popcorn at the multiplex and enjoyed the very well done scary moody gruesome straight ahead take on the fable. Only problem for Leo is that is dad is prone to become a 'lil overly involved with what's goin' on with those projected images. The wolfman rips off an arm, out of my mouth bursts an "AAAIIIIEEEEEEE!". He fangs down on a neck, "GOOD GOD!!" A head is severed, "WHAT THE...!!!!" Leo's only talking was in a hissed whisper, "dad- shut up!". I'm also inclined to get a 'lil emotionally involved the other way. Took both the youngsters to "Bridge to Terabithia" awhile back and right after one of the main characters died Kieran looked at me and asked, "Are you crying?" Before I had a chance to casually wipe my eyes in what I was hoping would be a non wiping away tears way she jabbed Leo and exclaimed, "Look, dad's crying!" My voice cracking, I, of course, denied any such thing. The rest of the film was spent with them watching me waiting for more waterworks and rest of the day was spent with much laughter recounting Mr. Blubbers.
We're all looking forward to Alice in Wonderland next! It better not be sad or scary!

Todays Tattoo Design!

May I suggest this should be an entire back piece? If you start now it should be done by tonight. Can't wait to see it!

Flea Market Find of the Day!

Have you seen my long lost brother? Have you seen my long lost sister?
I'm sure I have the original 'round here somewhere that inspired these two great interpretations. Let me start rummaging!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

M.O'C Tiki Mugs!

The fabulous Miles Nielsen, Mr. Munktiki, is taking on the heavy responsibility of bring my big-eyed tiki mug designs to life! The first one should be out soon (the pic is "in progress"), and if folks realize the obvious, that these are the greatest containers of fruity liquor filled beverages ever, and purchase 'em, there will be plenty more to follow! I'll keep you up to date!

Cute Contest Part 2!

Cute Contest Part 1!

Adorable daughter Kieran and I have fun with the video capabilities of our computer and go head to head on an impromptu battle of the adorable!

Apple and Tree!

I'm often asked how come I'm so good lookin'! OK, maybe I just imagine that I'm often asked, but that's besides the point. Enjoy this pic of Mom and Dad back in the day!

Flea Market Find of the Day!

The daily M.O'C treasure selection for all my friends who won't be up for a few hours yet after an enjoyable (if remembered) Saturday night!

M.O'C Estate Treasures!

Today's result of digging through my children's inheritance! Even carrying a 200 pound cross He keeps on winning! I'm keeping very still now bracing for that straight to hell thang!

ANOTHER tat design... for YOU!

Tattoo Du Jour! Brought to you by The sexy Sean Patterson, merchandising rep of the greatest artist of the ages! Hey, that's me! Check out his brand spanking new site today!

Today's Free Tattoo Design!

A perfect first tattoo! Oh Hell! Who am I kidding? ANY of my designs would be a perfect first, second, third or hundredth tattoo!

Bathroom Reading!

Have "Red Carpet Diaries" next to your throne because you don't want to have to think you should be doing something better with your time when thumbing through the pages. It's an odd Plan 9 From Outer Space like autobiography of Cojo, the "famous style columnist" (I never saw him before) who's not afraid to "dish the dirt". Odd because he dishes NO dirt, has stars names in bold print throughout to entice the possible purchaser that we'll get the inside dope on these celebrities, yet most the time he's just mentioning the stars without having ever met them, spoken to them or having anything to say about them. It's hard to put down because on every page you can't help but go "What?!" (or maybe, "Girl, Please!"), and have to see what you'll go "What?!" at on the next page.
Hearing him complain about his apartment in LA that his parents pay for while he goes years without looking for a job, recount everything he ever said that he finds funny (OK, I'm guilty of that too) and his general life dream aspirations of being a 10th tier hanger on of the famous is frightening. This is a character study interesting in it's complete vapid shallowness.
Also, let me go Zapruder on the cover photo (I'm beginning to think my references are becoming just for the elderly). What's up with his crotch?! Unveiled in the opening of a jacket that was never in fashion (Snap!) is a stuffed pair of Levis that must contain at least 7 socks. Let me get my laser pointer. His shoes are pointing to his right. If anything his hips might be facing us, but his fly is angled WAY to his left. It looks like he's trying for some 3-D effect with the zipper line. Now I'm a guy with a package (thank-you) who likes to look as substantial as possible, but this is like guessing how many jelly beans are in the jar. I'm figuring 4 ankles sock, a pair of stockings and a leg of lamb.
Yes, I'm ready for the "Mitch, you sure like takin' about guys bulges, don't ya!" comments, but if that's the price I have to pay to warn you or entice you (like watching my new favorite film "The Room"), I'll suffer though the slings of the the sad little people who know no better.
Look through the bargain bins, pick it up of for a penny (really) on Amazon, or just drive by my house and have my copy. It's on the porch now!

Monday, February 15, 2010

From the M.O'C Estate!

Another uncovered treasure! I firmly believe this is the reason God came up with string!

From the M.O'C Estate!

A light is shone on another buried treasure of the M.O'C basement. Is saying "M.O'C" talking about myself in the third person? If so, that could be weird. Anyway, like the Mona Lisa, this gal has a slight "come hither" look about her.

Startin' the Day Right!

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day!

More Free Tats!

The Daily Tattoo Design! I don't rest on the 7th day!