Bestest Buddy Hilary Barta (Facebook AND Myspace friend, so you know it's real), besides being one of my favorite artists has a yen for the limericks. To see how he magically molds words, visit http://limoday.blogspot.com/ today!
And, to start it off, a limerick 'bout 'lil 'ol me from my 50th Birthday roast!
Not long after Mitchell was born
He started to toot his own horn
Each topic he’ll steer
to on his career
All else makes O’Connell forlorn
A booklet that Mitchell once wrote
was titled “Pwease Wuv Me”, unquote
Conversing with Mitch
he’ll slip in a pitch--
not missing a chance to promote
Now that Mitchell is once again single
with chicks he is trying to mingle
To get his divorce
was costly of course
So ladies, his cash only jingles
Be it redhead, brunette and/or blond
of cheesecake our Mitchell is fond
As long as the lady
is sleazy or shady
the taste-buds of Mitchell respond
In the lair of this lecherous dad
is detritus from outdated fads
These novelty items
delight and excite ‘im
Downstairs in his bachelor pad
The art of the painter named Mitch
keeps working a vein that is rich
His subjects, iconic
he renders ironic
A master of pop crossed with kitsch
In Mexico, Europe, Japan
Mitch hangs it wherever he can
These gallery shows
to strangers expose
the id of this very strange man
This artist who signs his stuff “M’OC”
has need of a doc ‘round the clock
In therapy sessions
his scary confessions
explain his obsession with schlock
It isn’t good taste that’s gone bad
He can’t lose good taste he ain’t had
His cultural knowledge
Was not formed at college
But studying grindhouse, post-grad
In movies Mitch always wants more
gratuitous sex scenes and gore
His only complaint
is too much restraint
He truly loves excess galore
O’Connell is easy to please
his favorite movies are “Bs”
His intake is chronic
of flicks, psychotronic:
Be they sci-fi or horror--they’re cheese!
And Mitch is no fair weather fan
He watches whenever he can
For 24 hours,
no breaks, sleep or showers --
’cause Mitch is a marathon man
He’s charmed by the films of Russ Meyer
whose starlets all shed their attire
Their assets displayed,
and amply arrayed,
set Mitch’s libido on fire
Whatever Mitch is, he’s no prude
His preferring performances lewd
Enjoying this roast
he pictures the host
and all of his friends in the nude
He started to toot his own horn
Each topic he’ll steer
to on his career
All else makes O’Connell forlorn
A booklet that Mitchell once wrote
was titled “Pwease Wuv Me”, unquote
Conversing with Mitch
he’ll slip in a pitch--
not missing a chance to promote
Now that Mitchell is once again single
with chicks he is trying to mingle
To get his divorce
was costly of course
So ladies, his cash only jingles
Be it redhead, brunette and/or blond
of cheesecake our Mitchell is fond
As long as the lady
is sleazy or shady
the taste-buds of Mitchell respond
In the lair of this lecherous dad
is detritus from outdated fads
These novelty items
delight and excite ‘im
Downstairs in his bachelor pad
The art of the painter named Mitch
keeps working a vein that is rich
His subjects, iconic
he renders ironic
A master of pop crossed with kitsch
In Mexico, Europe, Japan
Mitch hangs it wherever he can
These gallery shows
to strangers expose
the id of this very strange man
This artist who signs his stuff “M’OC”
has need of a doc ‘round the clock
In therapy sessions
his scary confessions
explain his obsession with schlock
It isn’t good taste that’s gone bad
He can’t lose good taste he ain’t had
His cultural knowledge
Was not formed at college
But studying grindhouse, post-grad
In movies Mitch always wants more
gratuitous sex scenes and gore
His only complaint
is too much restraint
He truly loves excess galore
O’Connell is easy to please
his favorite movies are “Bs”
His intake is chronic
of flicks, psychotronic:
Be they sci-fi or horror--they’re cheese!
And Mitch is no fair weather fan
He watches whenever he can
For 24 hours,
no breaks, sleep or showers --
’cause Mitch is a marathon man
He’s charmed by the films of Russ Meyer
whose starlets all shed their attire
Their assets displayed,
and amply arrayed,
set Mitch’s libido on fire
Whatever Mitch is, he’s no prude
His preferring performances lewd
Enjoying this roast
he pictures the host
and all of his friends in the nude
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